SMARTHINKING Writer's Handbook

Chapter 4, Lesson 5

Nominalization and Passive Voice

Objective

In this lesson, you'll learn that nominalization and passive voice often obscure a writer's meaning, and therefore his or her style.

Actor and Agent

Most style experts advise writing students to begin as many of their sentences as they can with clearly stated subjects and verbs. This is because sentences with obscure actors (subjects) and actions (verbs) are almost always less than clear. Any noun can act as a subject and still be correct. For instance, in the sentence: "Liberation is the goal of the people," liberation is used as a noun and is technically correct. A study of style goes beyond the merely correct, though; it is interested as well in arranging words and structures for the greatest possible effect. This is why style experts often also advise writing students to use as many actors as possible as their subjects. By "actor," we mean people (or things) that can act. In the sentence we just looked at, the verb "liberate" is imbedded in the word "liberation." Since verbs are always more active than nouns, it might be best to revise our sentence in this way:

The people will liberate themselves.

Nominalization is the process of turning verbs or adjectives into nouns, and it is very common in American writing. As we said in Lesson 3 Word Choice, concrete words are better because they are more direct and immediate. Nominalization alters a word's most customary function, often turning an immediate (and seeable) action into an abstract idea. Let's look at a few examples of verbs that have been turned into nouns:

The children made their Christmas discovery.
It seems to me that that is inapplicable.
Sara looked at Jack with condemnation.

Our first example turns the clear verb "discover" into the noun "discovery." Just turning this noun back into a verb would improve the sentence considerably:

The children discovered their Christmas presents.

You might notice that turning nominalized nouns back into verbs typically reveals information that might have been left out in an original sentence. One good question to ask yourself when you revise to reverse nominalization is "who did what"? If your original sentence does not answer this question clearly, a revision will probably help your style by clarifying your meaning. In our example about the children making their discovery, the sentence does not tell readers what the children discovered; that missing information makes our original sentence more vague than it has to be.

In our second example, the verb "apply" has been turned into something like "not apply," which has been turned even further into something like "inapply." You might notice that the further any word gets away from its original intent and meaning, the more abstract it will become. We could turn our second nominalized sentence into something like this:

Do not apply the common evaluation standards to Mr. Smith.

But look what has happened! In our revision, we have inadvertently turned the verb "evaluate" into the noun "evaluation." We might want to revise that again:

When you evaluate Mr. Smith, do not apply the customary standards.

In our third example (Sara looked at Jack with condemnation), we've turned the verb "condemn" into the noun "condemnation. A revision might be:

Sara condemned Jack for yelling at the dog.

Since short words may be more direct and powerful than longer ones, we might even revise this sentence further by using a word like "scolded" for "condemned." For more about choosing your words for their directness and strength, see Lesson 3 Word Choice.

Turning Adjectives into Verbs

We use the process of nominalization when we turn adjectives into nouns, as well. Since adjectives are not as concrete as many other parts of speech, many style experts agree that it is wise to avoid overusing them. Consider the adjective "beautiful" in the sentence "She was such a beautiful baby." Although the word "beautiful" in this example may help us realize in some general way that the baby is appealing, we still can't see her-the word doesn't describe the color of her eyes or the shape of her face. If we take words that are automatically more abstract than others and make them even more abstract by turning them into nouns and noun phrases, we are further diluting our ability to show readers what we feel and think.

Here are a few examples:

He did everything with such intensity!
His heart was filled with goodness.
The courageousness with which he did everything filled us with admiration.

Here, the adjectives "intense," and "good" have been turned into nouns.

He was always so intense!
He had a good heart.
We admired his courage.

You might notice that we've revised to reverse normalization in our last example twice: we've turned the noun "courageousness" back into the adjective "courage," and the noun "admiration" back into the verb "admire."

Exercise

Revise to reverse the nominalizations in the following sentences, and then check your answers against ours.

The dancers had such graceful movements.
The cost of the tickets, however, was bothersome.
The judges were to come to a quick conclusion.

Passive and Active Voice

When we write in the passive voice, we often generate the same kind of confusion about actors (subjects) and actions (verbs) as we do when, in the process of nominalization, we turn verbs and adjectives into nouns. This is because, in the passive voice, subjects are often either embedded in noun phrases or taken out altogether. Sentences are in the passive voice when their verbs do not act, but are acted upon. First we'll show you a sentence written in the active voice, and then turn it into the passive, so you can see what a difference in clarity the active voice makes.

Mama said Alice would be home by noon.

The subject of this sentence is "Mama." That subject is followed immediately by "said," the sentence's verb. Compare the same sentence written in the passive voice:

It was said by Mama that Alice would be home by noon.

This revision moves the subject of the sentence--Mama--away from the reader; it also shifts the sentence's tone. This sentence written in the active voice is much more direct; as such, it takes on a tone of authority. The passive voice sentence seems, in comparison, to be avoiding its own topic; it takes on a tone of evasion.

Here are some other examples of sentences written in the passive voice:

The bomb was dropped.
The decision made by the committee was unanimous.
The veterinarian was sued by the dog's owner.
The woman was hit by a bus.

In these examples, the action being described is omitted altogether or hidden in a phrase. People use the passive voice when they do not wish to (or cannot) take responsibility for the action they're describing. We can revise these sentences in this way:

The crew of the Enola Gay dropped a bomb.
The committee made an unanimous decision. (You might notice that this revision still turns the verb "decide" into the noun "decision." An even better revision might be: "The committee decided unanimously to drop the lawsuit." Notice that when we revise to reverse both nominalization and passive voice, we often are required to supply missing information, improving our meaning immensely.)
The dog's owner sued the veterinarian.
The bus hit the woman.

In some cases, you might need to use the passive voice, as for example when there can be no known subject ("We've been robbed!"), or when you want or need to describe a person in a passive state. Scientific lab reports are often written in the passive voice, again to dilute the action being described. "The cat was dissected" seems less violent than "I dissected the cat."

For the most part, however, writers should attempt to use the active voice whenever possible because the passive voice is often a kind of linguistic lie, suggesting that there is no person responsible for an action or idea that requires responsibility.

Exercise

Rewrite the following sentences into the active voice:

The child's nightmares were caused by the movie.
Essentially, this committee feels that the actions in the report document serious negligence on the part of the company.
The trains were ridden on all day long.

Summary

A good style generally means a clear and direct style. Revising your sentences to reverse nominalization and passive voice constructions will produce more efficient and clear sentences. Revising in this way will often also help you clarify your meaning.